The Powers That Suck
by Lola Smith
Summary: So, I recently published a story similar to this and then decided I didn't like and completely re-vamped it. Hope you enjoy it. Pairings: Buffy/Angel, Xander/Anya, Willow/Tara, Cordelia/Gunn (I might not get around to this one, so don't hold your breath), and Wesley/Fred. Be warned that I am not a fan of Connor or the crap-tastic season 4 of Angel.


_A/N: This just kinda popped into my head and then I typed it out, so hope you enjoy it!_

Ok, so before we get to the actual story there are some things that need to be clarified if you want any hope of understanding the crap-tastic situation I had to undo.

Let's begin:

As a higher power their are several rules that must be adhered to. One of them being the law against direct interference.

When they wanted something done they could only change small details, or at least what they consider to be small details, that lead to the desired end result.

When they wanted Buffy Summers to be called as the slayer they ensured that her predecessor would be in close proximity when she died and the slayer power would transfer to the nearest potential.

Getting Angelus on their side was easier. All they had to do was send his vampiric seer a false vision of the gypsy girl, allow him to stew in guilt for roughly a century, and then send a lowly messenger after him.

Unlocking the witch's power was child's play at best, or worst, depending on how you think about it. Allowing the gypsy elder who cast the spell first to possess the young girl was not considered direct interference and not only fueled the flames of curiosity in poor, innocent, naive little Willow but also showed the potential greatness she had regarding magic.

The Watcher was inconsequential- even an emotionally hardened one such as Merrick was willing to die in the young girls place after but a few months- and the boy unimportant.

While the others gathered along the way served their purpose, it was a position that could have been filled by almost anybody so both seers, the other Watcher, and the two humans who had eventually fought alongside the vampire were deemed unimportant.

It was easy really. Too easy.

The Powers grew...restless with how seamlessly everything was coming along and decided to create a...back-up plan so to speak.

A child. A supernatural child, one who could truly ensure their victory.

Debate ensued on whether or not this was truly a good idea and which Warrior should be blessed with the child.

Some argued for the vampire, others the slayer, but most rooted for both to be the parents of the as of then fictitious child.

In the end it was decided that the child would go to the vampire as the slayer was busy grooming the other vampire and becoming parents may inspire them to restart their relationship.

They saw their chance when a human Darla was resurrected and later turned again.

They watched as the vampire stumbled blindly down the path of self-destruction before eventually sleeping with his sire.

Now really, they could have simply granted life to the vampires' reproductive organs but that could open them to the possibility of the child being completely human.

So instead they changed the entire universes laws in order to allow these two undead creatures to procreate. It was far from subtle but wasn't 'Direct Interference'.

The higher powers always did like their dramatics.

If any of the vampire's friends had bothered to research _at all_ about Connor's conception and birth they would have noticed that for the ten months that Darla was pregnant every single man or woman that hadn't been able to conceive before suddenly could.

You have no idea how many babies that should have never been born _were_ during those months. It was awful. Really. God, I hate babies.

So the baby was born, the vampire a father, and the Seer who had been possessed by a Power That Was took this as her chance to grow closer with the vampire.

What better way to get at a man than through his son?

The Powers were happy with this result and didn't even consider the possible effect it would have on the Slayer. Nope, they got their miracle child and in the aftermath of their success decided that Darla didn't deserve Hell and sent her to Purgatory instead.

Honestly, the Powers and the vampire act like giving birth to his son suddenly makes up for 400 hundred years of slaughter.

Of course the Powers didn't count on Not-Cordelia calling Sunnydale to smugly inform Buffy of the miracle baby, sending her even further into her downward spiral.

_Sigh._

If you haven't noticed yet the Powers have seriously fucked up and because I owe Whistler a favor for getting me out of a sticky situation nearly a millenia ago, its up to me to fix it.

What? You're surprised? You didn't actually believe that Whistler would just sit atound and watch his favorite couple dig themselves into an early grave, did you? And, yeah, that's exactly what they're doing.

Stick around, kiddies. We have _so_ much work to do.

**R&R please!**


End file.
